Son: Umma (Korean for “mom”), don’t you know I love you.
Me: I DO know you love me. Do you know I love you?
Son: Yes, I know you love me.
Me: How do you know?
Son: I just sense it!!
In Unconditional Parenting, Alfie Kohn writes, “How we feel about our kids isn’t as important as how they experience those feelings and how they regard the way we treat them….What matters is the message our kids receive, not the ones we think we are sending.”
Wow, did that resonate with me!
Too often, we are content to believe the our children “know” we love them, so it doesn’t matter if the “feel” it. The feeling is an afterthought, an “of course they are loved.” But, do you remember when you “felt” loved? Did the feeling fill you up inside with warmth?
I want my children to FEEL loved. I want them to know that there is nothing that would ever get in the way of that love. I want them to know that they can rest in my love for them; that it is steadfast and true.